Saturday, January 3, 2009

Voodoo Curses and Pulled Flowers:

Desperate Penguin:

Through a strange mix-up in schedule (ie: not looking at mine) I missed the game this afternoon. By all accounts, I didn't miss much but another humiliating loss to a pitiful team. Marc Andre Fleury was pulled in the first period after allowing 2 goals on 5 shots.... Sabu allows 3 goals on 12 shots in the second and Flower comes back in the third and allows 1 goal on 7 shots. That just ain't gonna cut it. Many times early in the season the Pens could pull a win out of their butts, but that just ain't happening recently. I'm not going to be one of those 'Fire or trade (insert player or coach here), and that'll fix everything' guys. The Pens are slumping, no one needs to tell you this, but there's no one thing that's going to fix everything. The Flightless ones are going to have to start winning games, and they're probably not going to win games until they believe they can. Either that, or we need to get a Witch Doctor in here to break the curse that someone has evidently put on the team. I think I can help with that:
Don't worry, she's certified, I've seen her badge.

I'm sending her right over to the Igloo, and she'll break the curse, I'm sure of it. But if anyone happens to be missing a chicken between here and the Igloo I had nothing to do with it. Now that that's taken care of, we can move on to other things.

Other Things: Sid the Battling Crosby and Geno have been named starters at the All Star Game Jan 2o-something in some Canadian city that I've never been to, but I understand they play hockey there. I turned my back on the standings for 5 minutes (I thought the voting was over) and Carey Price beat out The Tower of Flower Power for the starting goalie job. I'm sure the voting governing body (Florida State Voting Commission) had their eyes on the standings the whole time, and no hanky-panky was allowed. (I REALLY thought the voting was already over with Flower 5000 votes in the lead) I would demand a recount, but that would be just silly.

Sergei Gonchar (Sarge) started skating with the conditioning coach. There's a long way to go yet before he'll skate with the team, let alone return to the line-up, but it's a start. And let's admit it, we're looking for all the good news we can get right now. HCMT says that Sarge's return won't be for at least another month, which means next week Bob and Stogie will be speculating every game about his return for 'the next game'. Sheesh. TK did return to the line-up, but as I didn't see the game (Bad Blogger! No Doughnut!) I couldn't tell you how he did.

I was going to put in some post-game videos or some highlights, but I couldn't find anything that wouldn't make my little cartoon Penguin touch off the gasoline. Maybe after my Zombie Voodoo Witch Doctor (certified professional) has done her work. We'll see. Then again, maybe not, the Stagepenguin has already been sent over the edge:


Ali said...

You certainly didn't miss much -- that game was awful. Worst one I've seen in awhile...

Who knows what's up with the Pens, I think it's probably worse than we all ever imagined. Wow... it was just that bad.

A guy at the ice rink tonight saw my awesome (in my opinin at least) Pens beanie and asked me, "Did you see the game this afternoon?" I nodded without saying a word. "Yeah," he said back to me, "No words. It was that bad."

They need to pick it up -- before it's to late.


Stagerat said...

I'm counting on my Zombie Voodoo Witch Doctor (Certified Proffessional) to take care of that. There are some games where one word conversations cover it, unfortunately this was one of them. But remember, it wasn't too many years ago that these kind of games were all they had... so there's that anyway....(small consolation.

Ali said...

Small consolation, yes, but still consolation. :)

Anonymous said...

This is not helping me at all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think I am going to be reborn????????? I hate stupid curses!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A girl with many worries,

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