Unrelated Relative Facts:

Thought it was only fair to warn ya.

Game 3 of the Eastern Conference Finals will take place South of the Mason-Dixon line in the home of the Hurricanes. Unrelated fact: Danny (Bylsma, not Bi-elsma, Reaugh) is one of the 21 names chosen this year for hurricanes that may or may not hit Carolina. The Pens go into the game tonight up 2-0 in the Series and hope to keep the pressure on the 'Cranes and win one or two 'down there'. I could try to predict the game, scour the internet for the 'experts' opinion to back up my guessing. But you've only got to look back at the last two games to realize that I'm blowing smoke up your butt. No one knows or can predict what's going to happen. Just look at Thursday's game. Start with the score: 7-4. How unreal is that with these goalies? Cookie has a three point night, but no one notices because of all the other amazing shit that happened. How many people thought that we'd be talking about The Lord of the Infernal Realm dealing a beat-down on Eaves? Or the fact that Kris Le-tank's hair would burst loose not once, but twice? (I told you not to mess with the hat) Who pre-wrote the headline 'Kunitz Gets First Goal in 19 Games'? And let's not even talk about Geno's HT, or Pappa Geno getting busted by Mamma for kissing that blond that always sits in front of the Malkin Parental Units. (I'd like to take this opprotunity, once again, to thank them for having sex and the product thereof) Or what about Game 1? Let's all travel back to 7:00 Monday and put some money down on Boucher getting the GWG. Or the least likely thing of all. That VS would actually find an articulate commentator, and then hire him for the Penguins games. I'm no bumpkin, but I was shocked to hear words like 'corpulent' and 'sapient' from an announcer during a hockey game. Unrelated fact: Daryl Reaugh (pronounced 'ray') has a Stanley Cup ring with Edmonton in '88 but his name doesn't appear on the cup. So ask me for winning Lotto numbers, where lighning is going to strike, how many jelly beans would fit in the Igloo or something easy like that. But don't ask me to predict the outcome of Game 3.

Unrelated to just about anything:
Is it just me, or does Harold Priestly Gill III look like a parent that snuck into his kids Midget League game?

Something comes to mind when people criticize the Tower of Flower Power's efforts in the last two series. When you're in the Play-Offs losing is like being caught and mauled by a bear. (just wait, it'll sort of make sense in a minute) Now, when you're running from a bear, you don't have to be faster than the bear.... just faster than the guy you're running with. So far Ward's been the one with his laces untied. (see? that kinda makes sense... in a weird way)

Nobody Move, This is a Stickup:

I'm taking this series, don't try to stop me, or someone is going to get hurt..

Marc Andre Fleury and the rest of the Gang will try to send the Phlyers back across the state to start their summer golfing adventures. Game 5 of the SCPO starts at 7 tonight (you already knew that, didn't you?). It's tough to guess what kind of game to expect from Phylthy tonight. Last season we were all set for a really scrappy (dirty) game 5 and it just didn't happen. It was a clean, no-nonsense game, and the Pens walked off the ice with a big shiny thing that everyone refused to touch. (no, not Staals jock, the trophy thing) We'll have to wait (I hate waiting) and count on the guys to weather whatever the Phylthies come up with. And we're pretty sure they can.

The Pens will have the power of the Lord of the Infernal Realm on wing tonight. Miro Satan will be taking Syko's place somewhere in the line-up. Coach Dan made the decision (or announced it, anyway) this morning. Syko was a bit stunned, but it may be a case of CD trying to light a scoring fire under Petr's butt, combined with giving Satan some playoff ice time. Kris Le-tank got some kind of 'undisclosed' (here we go again) boo-boo in game 4 and will be a game-time decision as to whether or not he'll play. If Kris and his unruly mop sit out tonight, Boucher will step in.

The Pens are calling for a 'white out' for tonight's game and Charlie's Tuna will be giving white shirts out to anyone that walks into the Igloo tonight. I never did see what a big deal this was last year, but I've got to admit, it made a very cool look 20 seconds into this:

I still love this vid......

More to come as the mood strikes me.....

Thanks: UPDATED

I'd like to take this opportunity (one and only, I'm sure) to formally thank the New York Raggers for giving us home ice for the first round of the play-offs. They defeated the Phylthy Phlyers 4-3 this evening making the Pittsburgh Penguins the #4 seed in the Eastern Conference. The SCPO starts on April 15, but no word yet on scheduling... at least I don't think there is.... You'd think that someone would have spun their 'Wheel of Scheduling' and whipped something out by now... after all the season's been over for....... 2 whole hours! Don't they realize they're dealing with addicts here? C'mon Bettman! get your boys in gear! Sheesh...

Update-ish: It seems I have more pull with the NHL than previously suspected. At the un-godly hour of 6 am I was informed that the schedule for the Pens/Phlyers play-off series was out. (don't ask me what she was doing checking for schedules at 6am... I have no idea)

Wednesday, April 15 - PITTSBURGH. 7 p.m., FSN
Friday, April 17 - PITTSBURGH, 7 p.m., FSN
Sunday, April 19 - at Philadelphia, 3 p.m., NBC
Tuesday, April 21 - at Philadelphia, 7 p.m., FSN
*Thursday, April 23 - PITTSBURGH, 7 p.m., FSN
*Saturday, April 25 - at Philadelphia, 3 p.m., NBC
*Monday, April 27 - PITTSBURGH, TBD, FSN
* if necessary
The Big Screens will be set up outside the Igloo for the SCPO just like last year. Fans can watch both home and away games in front of the Gate 3 entrance on the 12x16 screen. I guess it was so popular last year Consol Energy and the Trib decided to sponsor it again. Way Cool.

Some Yo-Yo writer over at NHL.com is calling it the 'Keystone Clash', only marginally less excremental than 'The Battle of Pennsylvania'. But here's the preview he wrote just in case his idiocy doesn't extend to the rest of his writing.

Miroslav Satan looked a bit upset during his off-day interview, not that I can blame him. I'm sure he didn't apreciate being sent to the minors, but he's a proffesional, and he's handled the whole situation a lot better than could have been expected. Oh, and if you're over at PP.com and see an off day interview with Marc Andre Fleury, and you ask yourself, "Why didn't the Ratt post this? He was here stealing stuff anyway." Well, I'll tell ya. It's a tease! There is no off day Flower interview. Don't be sucked in by their propaganda! It's some sick, twisted joke designed to make you stare at their player doing nothing. I'm not sure why this is funny, but it must be to some NHL puter geek somewhere..... sheesh.


I know I mentioned something about it the other night, but it still amazes me. Since the inception of the Art Ross Trophy for scoring in 1948 the Pens have won it a mind-wobbling 13 times..... They weren't even in the League for the first 20 years of the damned thing, and they've won it 4 more times than any other team in the League..... And that includes the 7 times Gretz won it for the Oilers... If you just go from '68 they've won it almost twice as much as anyone else, and in the last 21 years the Pens have won the Art Ross more than all the other teams combined.... Translation: We've been incredibly lucky to have some pretty good hockey players here in da 'Burgh. They ought to just carve the Fighting Penguin on the thing....







Wild Women: Team USA has repeated as world champs this year, defeating Canadia 4-1 in the Gold Medal round Sunday. This makes the second year in a row that the women have sent the Canadian women home with the silver. There will be 6 exhibition matches between the US and Canada this year and 2 possible tournaments that they could meet in. Making a psychotic Olympic rematch a distinct possibility. Finland took bronze in front of their home crowd defeating Sweden 4-1 (do I sense a scoring trend?).








Unexpected Reinforcement: I've taken this opportunity during the break in the action to ask for a little divine intervention. I'm not normally a religious person but I thought two things 1) It couldn't actually hurt anything, and B) At this point of the season we'll take all the help we can get. In response to my inquiry of possibly deity sponsorship for the Flightless Ones I got this response:

Of course after the amount of bourbon I poured into them they'd have promised sponsorship to a brothel.

Penguin Invasion:

Ok, this was supposed to post late last night and, computer whiz that I am, I hit 'save' instead of 'post' and then never checked that it posted (the one time you don't check... sheesh) so here it is in all its late glory.

The Penguin invasion of the Stanley Cup Play-Offs will begin this weekend with the final placement of the 8 teams in the Eastern Division. The Pens are tied with Philthy and Carol-in-a for 4-6. The Canes have more wins, the Phlyers have fewer games, and the Pens have... the current scoring leader of the NHL, and some other hockey guys you might have heard of (Flower, Croz, Tank..., maybe you've heard of some of those guys).

Marc-Andre Fleury wasn't in the net tonight, but he left his well trained goalposts to make 5 saves for his replacement, Matheiu Garon. Garon and the Pens looked a bit shaky during the first period but came on late in the first to tie on their way to defeating the Aisles 6-1 to clinch at least a 6th place berth in the play-offs. Philippe Boucher announced his return to the line-up with the tieing goal in the first and that opened the floodgates as the Pens never looked back. Pittsburgh was awesome in the PK, even though there were too many damn penalties. 2 long 3-5 kills (one without the help of the Ever Dangerous Rob Scuderi, the super-secret extra goalie) that were defended to perfection and gave Garon a chance to prove that The Flower isn't the only Gumby-goalie on the team. Other than the 7-2 penalty differential the guys played a pretty good game against a team of men trying to prove to their management that they deserve to be employed next season. Geno picked up 2 points on assists on Boucher's and Crosby's goals and finally acted like he was excited to be in the lead for the Hart trophy. "Yeah, I feel good." Malkin said, "One game left, it's OK, I think it's too much points (for Ovechkin to catch him)." and then he went on to promise that if O'retchkin scores 4 points he'll score two more Saturday. Kris Le-tank will receive a special TFS award point for crashing the net and nearly redirecting Dupuis' goal in.

Fan Appreciation, Appreciation: My favorite part of the season (other than the play-offs when the Pens are in) is the Fan apreciation night. I was blown away when I first moved here and started watching the Pens as a 'home-town' team when after the last game of the season the team gave their jerseys away and started throwing T-shirts up into the stands and generally making goofy fools out of themselves thanking the fans for all their support throughout the season. Watching Maximus sitting in the Penguins Polaris given away to some undiserving fan (ie: not me). Or The Tower of Flower Power pitching shirts at one of his team-mates on the ice (probably Max), Malkin making sure a kid got the game stick he handed over the glass, although it was somewhat disturbing to see the grin on Cookie's face when he was imprudently armed with a Tshirt cannon. Just about all of them were signing something thrown over the glass and whipping it back (hopefully to the person that threw it), and then each one of them giving a fan their jersey (Raine is ready to track down the blond 'bitch' that won MAF's jersey so she should be warned) and revealing the 'Fighting 5th' shirt worn under their gear (the Pens collected over 100 grand for the Fallen Heroes Fund at the game). Makes you feel like the guys think they're lucky to have a bunch of semi-crazy Pensaddicts screaming from the stands and we all know we're lucky to have them to root for, shout at or drool over as the case may be.... Thanks Guys.

Satan Sighting: Miroslav Satan has cleared re-entry waivers (uh....... nope, to complicated to explain) and will be back on the Pens roster in time for the Montreal game and throughout the play-offs (however far they go). We are pleased to see the Lord of the Infernal Realm back on the 'Big Squad' and hope that no one had to sign his soul away to get this to happen.



Winter Classic News: Reports are that next year's Winter Classic will take place in Fenway Park, possibly the Broons against either the Crapitals or the Phlyers. What does this mean to the fans? Well we should all look for a trade involving Ty Conklin to one of those three teams so he can keep his streak of playing in every NHL outdoor game alive.

The Stars Are Bright in Texas:

Somehow I hit 'Save' instead of 'Publish' in my rush to get to a really good pot roast so this is a bit late.

Marc Andre Fleury racked up his 100th win this afternoon in a rare (second time this year) Sunday win for the Pens. To tell you how cool (or just out of it) this guy is, he didn't even know it was his hundredth until Potash told him after the game. Flower stopped 20 of 21 shots and kept the scoreboard clean until 14 minutes or so left in the third period when Erikson of the stars flipped in a power play goal during what seemed like a rash of Pittsburgh penalties. The Tower of Flower Power was making some quality saves, just needed to make fewer of them. Flower is Ok with facing so few shots (so am I) he thinks it just gives the team a better chance to win, and we all like that idea. So the Pens are now in 8th place in the Conference having, at least temporarily jumped over Carolina and the Buffaslugs.

Let's see, where to begin.... oh yeah. FSN has now been crossed off my Christmas card list.... I missed more than half of the first period and Le-tank's goal when their Atlanta 'Master Control' went off-line. (I suspect collusion by the Thrashed, Army's still pissed about being traded) But they got the game back by the second, so they just missed a visit by my Scary Witchdoctor Lady. Tank's goal was a thing of beauty set up by Scud's hit in the zone and Geno's pass, it ended up being the game winner. The Incredible Malk added another 3 points (1g, 2a) to continue to lead the League in points. And evidently Sydor still owes Geno 50 bucks and got traded to avoid paying it back. Geno squashed Syds against the glass in the second period, just after Error called him a 'bull' out on the ice. Staal has been playing like a madman at both ends of the ice, I think this is what they had in mind when they extended his contract. And Miro Satan flat stole the puck and mesmerized the Stars with his Infernal Stare and finessed the puck in behind Stephan.

The Pens had another brush with their 3rd period slump, but it was much shorter and they seemed to snap out of it when Eriksson scored the PP goal. I think Coach Dan is getting his system of playing into their heads. And since their heads mostly control their feet and hands, I guess that's a good thing. So it's on to the Sunshine-less state for Tampa Tuesday, and Sunrise (have fun Penschick!) Thursday. The Catnips won their game today, keeping just a fingertip ahead of the Pens. We'll see how this plays out by the end of the week, but both the Raggers and the Cats are 2 points ahead of the Pens, the Kitties have one game in hand (don't make me go through that again) but the Raggers do not, but they absolutely crushed the Av's this afternoon 6-1.

Shooting Blackbirds:

It's not very often you can look at a 5-4 game and say what a good job your goalie has done. But this is one of those times. Marc Andre Fleury made some absolutely sick saves, especially in the third period when he faced 20 out of the 45 shots he'd see for the game, to give the Pens the chance to win in overtime.

By the way, these guys are driving me insane and add to that the tremendous amount of money I'm blowing on Pepto and you can see the problem I'm having. 2 goals in the first period, Staal with a bottle rattler and then my new friend Chris Kunitz slips one underneath Huet, and where was he? Parked in front of the net. Add to that 2 pretty good short handed chances and a couple of classic cases of Flower puck robbery, and I just had such a warm glow going into the first intermission Error and Stogie's babbling just faded to a muted background noise. Then the second period..... enough said... blind, biased refs and weird bounces leading to another power play goal by Towes (how is that Taves anyway?) and I was reaching for my Phillips Screwdriver (Milk of Magnesia and vodka) when Toew's high sticked a puck into the net, (that Error and Stogie were quite willing to give him). After it was disallowed Miro showed the Midwest the Power of Satan and then Mad Maximus was lifted and plastered into the glass by Dupuis after he dinked one off of the defenseman's skate 45 seconds later. So I put my disgusting drink down but then picked it right back up when the Pens seemed to have a mid-season flashback allowing the Darkbirds 20 shots in the third period and then allowing 2 more goals. Toews scored the Power Play hat trick and I nearly puked into mine... but managed to hang on to my doublestack cheeseburger long enough for Geno to blast a no-look pass from the Sarge right into the net over Neimi's shoulder. I salute the Sarge, that pass was a thing of beauty.

Things that are still good: Geno is still tops in the League in scoring and assists, Sarge has a 6 game scoring streak, the Pens are only 2 points (68) behind 6th place Florida (70 with 2 games in hand) They're still sitting in 10th but the rest are coming back toward us. All four teams (9th-6th) play tomorrow, so we shall see how that plays out.

Well, time for the Ratt to fire up the Zamboni and travel on to Dallas where the Pens will meet the Stars on Sunday (oh crap! another Sunday afternoon game).

Smells Like.... VICTORY:

And the main reason it smells like victory, is the incredible play of Marc Andre Fleury. The Tower of Flower Power stopped 36 out of 37 shots and all of the SO attempts, to lead the Penguins to a 2-1 Shoot out win over one of, if not the, best teams this season. The Flower was bending and twisting like Gumby on a mission making some incredible saves, some of which not only did I not see the shot, but I didn't see his glove move to catch it. This guy has the reaction time of a squirrel on speed, and the flexibility of.... well...... Gumby dabbit! And when MAF was a touch out of position (not very often that is) the Flower Protection League was there to shoo the puck away from the danger zone. (except that one time, but we're probably not going to spend much time talking about that) Boucher proved once again that he's no slouch as a goaltender because the Pens were shooting everything at the net. (Finally!) Bill Thomas scored his first goal as a Pen off an unintentional re-direct by Sharks defenseman Rob Blake,(thanks Rob) and then proceded to shoot at the net every time he touched the puck after that, he even shot it twice from the locker room. But the whole thing was set up by the hard work of Miroslav Satan. Satan evidently decided he didn't like the view from Therrien's dog-house because he was working hard, getting a point on the goal and also somehow or another getting the Sammich of the Game... wild. Sidney Crosby has been having some trouble with shoot-outs recently, but he faked Boucher out of his jock to score the game winner. But it wouldn't have even have gotten that far if Flower hadn't made this double save, or even triple if you count the fact that he kept Whitney from going into the net too.



Ok, so Whits did kind of go into the side of the net... but that doesn't count. Oh, and I wish I had a picture of Orpik making 'psycho eyes' at Claude Lemieux after a little conversation the two of them had. I don't know how to tell you this Claude, but it's been a while since you've been in a 'dust up' in the NHL and I'm not sure if Brooksie is the guy for you to mess with to get back into the swing of things. Oh, and I'd stay away from Godard too if I were you. Either one of those two guys could shorten your whole 'come-back' thing. But hey, you're and adult, so you can roll your dice and move your mice.... just don't say we didn't warn ya.

More to come later, I've got to go and score some more Pepto for the girlfriend.

Flowers and Satan-ic Penguins

Marc Andre Fleury and the rest of the cast skipped practice to play soccer Monday. No, they didn't hold a mutiny, and no one tied M. Therrien down and taunted him by pelting him with soccer balls. Mike decided it was a 'good day to go to the gym' so while only 4 Pens went through skate drills, everyone played a little pick-up soccer and then hit the weights. Crosby and Cookie manned the goals and according to MAF, 'Satan made everyone else look bad'. Miroslav Satan may be making everyone look bad playing soccer, but The Lord of the Infernal Realm is looking pretty good on the score sheet. He leads the team in goals (6) and with his 4 assists he's third on the team in scoring.

Flower had his say after practice today about playing the Oilcans Thurs.

The Tower of Flower Power, feels that any team in the NHL is worthy of respect, and that a goalie 'always has to keep himself ready'.
Other Penguin Stuff: Brooks Orpik, Eric Goddard, Phil Borque, and Brian Trottier were all at Clark Cheverolet Mon. night signing autographs for an un-named charity. They were signing anything that you brought in, or bought there, and the proceeds were all going to charity. (I hope that Brian has learned to clean up his language since this vid was made) (warning NC17 content) Ultra Marathon man Phil Rosenstein is running across the country for the Mario Lemieux foundation, and will be honored at the game Thursday. He started out in Cali (Santa Monica) and ran Rt. 66 to Chicago then, via Picksburgh, to Atlantic City NJ (hey, fit guys got hit the tables too) in about two weeks. There would have to be a LOT of really big guys I owed money chasing me with objects of mayhem to make me run down the block, so I have nothing but respect and bewilderment for this guy.
Marc Andre Fleury, Sidney Crosby, Evgeni Malkin, Sergei Gonchar, and Ryan Whitney have all been named to the All Star-Fan Ballot. Voting will begin Nov. 12, and fans can vote as often as they like. I'll post the link as soon as the voting starts. (hint, hint). I'm not sure what 2 players that are on the IR are going to do if they're voted in, but I'm willing to find out by shamelessly voting for them repeatedly.
Other Goalie News: Martin Broduer will have to wait 4-6 months to continue his quest to eclipse Patrick Roy and Terry Sawchuck's records. What was originally lied about (preliminary diagnosis) as an 'elbow bruise' turns out to be a torn biceps tendon in his left elbow. Uncle-Daddy is 7 wins shy of Roy's record 551 and 5 shut outs shy of Sawchuck's 108. He'll undergo surgery Thursday and the team 'will be making no further comment until after the surgery'. Big deal, most of what they've said so far you can't trust anyway. If you get the idea that I don't like 'non injury disclosure hockey' you wouldn't be far wrong.

Meet Me in St. Louie, Louie:

Marc Andre Fleury allowed 3 goals on 22 shots in the Gateway City to give the Blues the blues. The Tower of Flower Power had a solid, sometimes flashy excursion between the 'arches' in St Louis, despite allowing 2 goals on only 4 shots in the first, at which point many bridges in the Golden Triangle where crowded with despondent, soon to be damp, Pensaddicts. Flower and the FPL tightened up, and shut down the Blues and their #1 PP for most of the rest of the game. MAF will be at BC Sports in the Ross Park Mall from 12:00-1:30 Sunday to sign autographs (if you buy a little 50-60 buck autograph ticket), sorry, slipped up on this one and didn't get the news until late.

Recap-ish: The 'Saved by Zero' commercial must die the death. Ok, that being said, about halfway through the first, Wolverine (Jackman, get it?) scored off a sneaky boomerang shot that didn't stay in the goal for more than a second, I was hopefully waiting for the replay, but it betrayed me by showing that the shot actually went in. Later, on a bad call/hipcheck/trip on Brooksie, Malkin (who let's face it, doesn't count face-offs as one of his skills), won two or three in a row to help the PK hold the enemy shotless. That shotless PP thing lasted for the first two periods. Pessonen's gold helmet tangent in the FSN booth, and how Steggies nephew is a better researcher than Steggo. Just when I was about to throw something at the screen during a Pens PP, Le-Tank flips a pass to El Sid who slips it to Satan who picks up his own errant pass to show Chris Mason the power of the Lord of the Infernal Realm with a nice wrist-shot over his shoulder. This would have been much cooler if Oslie hadn't scored off a good McClement pass 25 seconds later. (Cue cheesy Hee-Haw song) Intermission Question: Do they just shuffle those penguin/Potash commercials, or does someone actually watching the game pick them? And why do Potash's penguins get more play than the Pittsburgh Penguins during the break?

Second Period start reads like an FPL report. Scuds made a nice diving play, Le-Tank gets slashed by the God of wine and song (Baccus), no call. Go-Go scores on a nice wrister from near the blue line. Blues try to quick-counter again but the apparent goal was waved off on a high stick pass. Tank comes back and Flower makes a glove save on a shot that I didn't even see on slow-mo replay. Bobbo and Steggo go off on yet another tangent talking about how Alex Pietrangelo pronounces his name different than Frank to cover Steggie's butt for mispronouncing Frank's name all these years until we almost miss Brewer's holding Sid. Just about when you think the PP is hopeless, Geno slaps one from the blue line, through McKee's legs and past a confused Mason to make the score 3-2. Then 30 seconds later TK smacks his own rebound off Mason's butt to make the game 4-2. A few minutes later, Golden Helmet revved up Spaceballs I and mashed some Bluenote into the boards. Kevin and Vince over at Pessonen and the Pens are probably doing back flips watching this. Mason almost brainfarts one into his own goal, Errey almost has an aneurism talking about it. Just before the end of the period, Syko goes psycho on a Blues defenseman who was taking stick-liberties with El Capitan. As exciting as the second was, Error and Stogie want to talk about how Alex Pietrangelo is his own grandpa or the strange, almost West Virginian way that Alex and Frank are related..... I listened for 10 minutes and still don't understand it.

The Third Period was much more relaxing to watch, even though I wasn't counting this one as a win until it was in the bag. Chris Holt, the Blues backup goalie made a spectacular save... from the bench. And then we learned that it takes 4 blues players to take on one Energizer Bunny (TK) and Zigomanis is more than a face-off specialist. Ziggy was working his butt off, blocking shots, stealing pucks and taking shots. Orpik became the defensive beast we all know him to be and put Kariya on his butt. Later, Berglin picks up his own rebound and flips one past the Flower and things are tense while everyone waits for yet another melt-down, until 40 seconds later when Maximus (keep the French-Manchu, it's working) makes a deal with Satan to score his second goal of the year off of a nice clear by Orpik. MAF with some nice work in the final minutes and an empty net gift for Staal from Geno sealed the deal. 6-3

Wrap-up, wrap-up: Got to give the Pens credit. Even though the PP seemed to be more lucky than good sometimes, the PK was simply awesome shutting down the Blues, who despite some problems have a stellar PP. They didn't go into a shell at all in the third, keeping up the offensive pressure and scoring goals. The Zebra patrol seemed to have a bit of a problem seeing some fairly blatant slashing penalties, and the FSN duo had a bit of a problem repeating the word 'jump' 654 times and I now feel like a member of the Pietrangelo clan due to the genealogy laid out by Steigerwald.

Moronic Russian Quote of the Day: Alexander Semin has decided that since Ovie is out of the country he should do what he can to keep the Craps/Pens rivalry going. Either that or he feels safer knowing that it'll be Jan. 14th until he'll have to pay for his remarks about El Sid. You see Sperm the Worm has decided that El Capitan is just your average player hyped to the max. "I think if you take any player, even if he is 'dead wood' and start promoting him, you'll get a star. Especially if he scores 1oo points. No one is going to care about anyone else. No one is going to care whether he possesses great skill. Let's say you put someone in front of the net and let him deflect pucks in , and he scored 50 goal: everyone will say 'wow' and then hand him 10 mil per year." Uh.... 'dead wood' and '100' points don't normally go together. And all apologies to him, but that sounds a lot more like Ryan Malone than Troy and Trina's little boy. Just another case of a guy saying something contrivercial to get a rise and that becomes more important than the relative stupidity of the player making the comment. My advice? When you pay your dues, Alex, you'll get your props. Until then, keep your mouth shut and play hockey.

Sabu-tage and the power of Satan:

I'll update this throughout today as more interviews are posted. I guess everyone at PP.com decided just to get the hell out of Beantown as quickly as humanly possible. (and who could blame them?)
Sabu was a beast in goal tonight, allowing Marc Andre Fleury a bit of a rest before the big road trip starting this weekend, stopping 35 out of 36 and allowing only 1 out of 5 in the shootout for the 2-1 overtime win. He looked absolutely awesome at times stopping breakaways and smothering rebounds.
The Pens once again took a series of penalties, culminating with Satan taking one for hooking near the end of the first period. Crosby and Malkin streaked down the ice at the end of the kill, Malkin drew a penalty on his breakaway and back hand shot, when the Master of the Infernal Realm snuck out of the box and top-shelfed the rebound. Which gives him the lead in most goals for the team. (Marion who?)
Just a bit earlier there was a 'fight' between Goddard and Shawn Thorton, and the FSN boys made a bit out of Thorton's last fight being against BGL, but from what I saw of both fights Thorton seems to just want to get into a man-clutch with tough guys.

Also in the first period, Mad Max seemed to have taken the target off Malkin's back and put it on his own as he was really whacked a couple of times by Boston players obviously jealous of his superstar status.
Second period was a back and forth duel with Sabu getting lucky with a couple of missed nets, but making some solid saves when pressed until Staal, obviously anticipating tackling his brother in another NHL commercial, took a stupid penalty and Boston proved its policy of 'Let's just buy big guys so they can get in the way occasionally' really paid off as Lucic was lurking around in front screening Phil Kessel's shot. 1-1. Later in the period El Sid got the tip of a stick in the face and, being a bit grumpy with the cold and all, decided to take it out on Andre Savard, pinning him to the ice and roughing him up a bit. I don't know if that was supposed to fire up the Pens, but it worked on Pascal Dupuis who got away with launching himself at Dennis Wideman behind his own net. I've never seen Dupuis so charged up to hit someone.
Third period was exciting to watch, but boring to write about. Except for a couple of excellent saves by Sabu and when the linesman got hit with a puck and then sandwiched between Biz and Hnidy.
Overtime was more of the same back and forth hard grinding hockey until I guess Staal was feeling guilty for drawing a penalty on a break away with Malkin, or thinking about smacking his brother on Thursday, and took a much embellished slash penalty to negate the 4 on 3. The 3on3 was a further case of, 'Just shoot the puck' as the Pens seemed to be putting on a passing exhibition to wind the game up.
Shootout: Le-tank: poke checked and shut down. Syko: flipped the short-side backhand into the net, Crosby: suffering from NyQuil hangover, denied, Satan: saving his power for the next game, denied, Malkin: Swings wide, stuns Thomas with his hip-wiggle-kick move and flips one into the net. Overtime Victory. If you didn't get to see it, here you go:
Speaking of Malkin, and speaking of speaking, the other day I reported that Malkin gave a Potash interview (update on Potash watch, no hits yet) and that if I found it, I would post it. Well..... here it is, it's tv to camera, the sound in the beginning is inaudible, but you get to hear the Incredible Malk speak.

Everybody hang on... new guy at the wheel:

Complainers and whiners, please step in front of the bus so your complaints can be processed in a timely manner. Ok, let's start out slowly and see where we go from there.

top: Ready to go. middle: First stroll on the ice. bottom: Fleury denying the power of Satan

Last Friday I was among the many who gathered at the scrimmage/practice in drooling anticipation of finaly being able to get my Pensfix. And let me tell you, there were things to be impressed with, but let's stick with the title character of this blog and deal out some pre-season Flower sightings. Fleury (on the black team) seemed very loose and focused but was somehow unable to stop Hall Gill's super secret practice shot during warm-ups. That got MAF a few jeers and Gill a round of high-5's as he skated past the apposing bench. All that was forgotten by the shoot-out when he stopped Croby's attempt and then rode his goalie stick like a hobby horse and taunted Sid. I have more pics to post and I will as soon as I figure out how to get this thing out of first gear. Thanks for your patience and more to come.